I had a pregnancy that would make most women cringe. I had to have a home health nurse, I had hyperemesis, I had to have weekly injections, several hospitalizations, bed-rest, and I was usually hooked up to an IV. On May 14, I had my Amnio. I was so scared but I knew I needed to do it. It was very painful but so worth it because the test would let us know if Blaine’s lungs were good enough to be out of the womb. After the test, I had to go home and wait for the results. I was set to go into the hospital at 5am the next morning and the uncertainty was very stressful. Steve and I spent the night at my Mom’s since she lives close to the hospital. We watched TV, read and did everything we could to distract ourselves from the not knowing.
We went to bed at around 11pm. I had a hard time falling asleep but I finally managed to. I was awoken by a phone call;the hospital called to say we could go through with he c-section. After hearing that, I tried to go to sleep again but I couldn’t. I waited till Steve was asleep then I went downstairs to read Hunger Games and try and relax. I fell in and out of sleep on my couch but the jitters would stir me awake.
When my alarm went off, I showered and ended up getting super hyper with excitement. This pregnancy that was so difficult was almost over! Soon, I would be holding my son and every uncomfortable moment would have been worth it tenfold.
My Mom dropped Steve and I off at the hospital since they only allowed one person with me during the prep for the C-section.They put in my IV, gave me some meds, and I had to wait. Steve and I watched TV and tried to entertain ourselves. I was increasingly getting nervous about the spinal tap. I kept trying to remain calm.Eventually, they gave Steven and I the clothes that we needed to wear in the OR. Finally, they said it was time to go! My spinal took forever. They had a hard time placing it and I got poked a lot. I was so scared during the whole thing. After what seemed like an eternity, they were able to administer it and I got super numb. They let Steven in once they were ready and he kept me really calm during the whole surgery. He knew exactly when to talk, what to say and how to make me feel at ease. Second c-sections hurt a lot worse than the first. They have to go through scar tissue and then remove it. Then they are able to get out the baby
When they got to where Blaine was, before they actually took him out, my Dr. said he was pouting! When he was born and we heard his cry, Steve and I couldn’t help but crying too. He was finally here.
Because I heard him cry, I assumed his lungs were fine. Steve stayed with the baby while they closed me up from surgery. They wheeled me into recovery where I got very sick. My pulse was in the low 50′s, I was shivering uncontrollably and I was vomiting a lot. When they brought Blaine to me, I needed help holding him. He was so beautiful.
I got a whole ten minutes with him before they took him to the Special Care Nursery. Blaine kept making this grunting sound and they determined he had some lung issues. They needed to keep an eye on him. I was so worried about him. Steve kept splitting his time between the baby and I . We both weren’t doing so hot. That must have been very stressful for him, but he always acted calm for my sake.
Finally, they let me go to my room, but I was still vomiting really badly. I got hot flashes and all I could think about was Blaine. Nothing had gone according to plan. I wanted to nurse within the first hour of his life, instead they gave him formula. I wanted him with us at all times, instead he was in the SCN. It was hard not to get frustrated. Everyone had visited the baby in the nursery, except for me. They said I wasn’t well enough yet.
At around 10pm, they let me go see him. I couldn’t stop crying. I wanted him with me. Finally, I calmed down and I nursed him. They said they would let him come back to our room with us and just check on him from there since he had improved. They explained that he cannot get sick, be around sick people, children that do not live with us, and he can only be around vaccinated people.
We went back to our room and got to indulge in having him with us. It was magical. We constantly cuddled him and there wasn’t a moment where he wasn’t in one of our arms.
Family came to visit and Blaine was showered with unconditional love. We started to learn his personality, he got acquainted with the voices he heard from inside the womb.
His big brother, Jacob, came to visit on Friday, once we were sure Blaine was OK. Jacob was in awe of Blaine. He kept looking at his toes and fingers. Counting them, holding them, staring at them. We hung out as a family
I can’t believe I am the mom of two sons. It is so exciting. Steve is the most dedicated father. He helps me with everything, makes sure I have enough rest, and he pampers me. Jacob has exceeded my expectations of how a big brother should act. He is so in love with Blaine. I feel so blessed to have the family that I have. I cannot believe how settled I feel. This is the happiest I have ever been.